My yoga teacher training has finally started - yay!
Today was day two. I was incredibly anxious before starting - but that is nothing unusual for me. Anything that is unfamiliar and involves lots of other people makes me nervous. My belly was all full of butterflies and it felt like the first day of school. Which I guess it kind of was.
I had the usual first day worries: Like what if no one likes me? What if I'm not good enough? What if I fail? What if I don't enjoy it and it is all a waste of money and time? Blah, blah, blah.
But so far, so good! Everyone is lovely, I don't feel like I am in over my head and I am really loving it.
One thing that has become clear though is that the course involves more than just learning the skills to become a teacher. It is going to be quite a personal journey too with a lot of digging deep. And it is definitely looking beyond just the physical side of yoga - the asanas. We are gaining an understanding of all of the elements and how they can be integrated so that we can achieve increased flow throughout the body and a quietened mind. It is heavy but amazing stuff.
Today, a relatively simple exercise left me feeling a bit lost and, as a result, quite introspective. We were asked to discuss in small groups what our dream life would look like if there were no obstacles. Basically, let our minds go wild and put out to the world our greatest fantasies for an ideal life. What could be easier?
Some people seemed to have no trouble at all. They could articulate beautifully what their perfect life would be like down to the finest detail. And it was out-there stuff too. Global empires and what not.
Me? Well, I came up with some cool stuff, I guess. A house in the rainforest but also near the sea - perhaps in Bangalow. But I wouldn't live there all the time. Nooo. Because I would still have to keep my job, wouldn't I? I would work in the city and then, when I needed to escape, I could go to the house in Bangalow. Oh and I would have a dog in addition to my two cats.
Seriously. I let my mind run wild and that is the best I could do!?! A holiday home and a dog? Thing is, every time I thought of something cool - like living on a tropical island, teaching yoga and looking after stray kittens and puppies - this voice would come into my head saying "But you have to be realistic! Otherwise, you are being silly!"
It didn't seem to matter to me that the aim exercise wasn't to think about what I could realistically achieve. I was meant to be thinking big, thinking outside what might seem possible. I was allowed to be silly!
I found this to be really confronting. Like if I said something crazy, I would be ridiculed if I then failed to achieve it. Which is daft, really. Because when others shared their awesome hopes and dreams, my instinct was not to ridicule them. It was to encourage them. Their dreams sounded great. And I wanted to think of ways that they could actually achieve maybe even just one small part of their dream to help them on their way.
But I was still unable to think of anything for myself. I am just not sure what my real dream is. There is definitely a lot of work for me to do around this.
Hmmm...
So day two and I am already feeling challenged. Imagine where I will be by the end of the year!!
Today was day two. I was incredibly anxious before starting - but that is nothing unusual for me. Anything that is unfamiliar and involves lots of other people makes me nervous. My belly was all full of butterflies and it felt like the first day of school. Which I guess it kind of was.
I had the usual first day worries: Like what if no one likes me? What if I'm not good enough? What if I fail? What if I don't enjoy it and it is all a waste of money and time? Blah, blah, blah.
But so far, so good! Everyone is lovely, I don't feel like I am in over my head and I am really loving it.
One thing that has become clear though is that the course involves more than just learning the skills to become a teacher. It is going to be quite a personal journey too with a lot of digging deep. And it is definitely looking beyond just the physical side of yoga - the asanas. We are gaining an understanding of all of the elements and how they can be integrated so that we can achieve increased flow throughout the body and a quietened mind. It is heavy but amazing stuff.
Today, a relatively simple exercise left me feeling a bit lost and, as a result, quite introspective. We were asked to discuss in small groups what our dream life would look like if there were no obstacles. Basically, let our minds go wild and put out to the world our greatest fantasies for an ideal life. What could be easier?
Some people seemed to have no trouble at all. They could articulate beautifully what their perfect life would be like down to the finest detail. And it was out-there stuff too. Global empires and what not.
Me? Well, I came up with some cool stuff, I guess. A house in the rainforest but also near the sea - perhaps in Bangalow. But I wouldn't live there all the time. Nooo. Because I would still have to keep my job, wouldn't I? I would work in the city and then, when I needed to escape, I could go to the house in Bangalow. Oh and I would have a dog in addition to my two cats.
Seriously. I let my mind run wild and that is the best I could do!?! A holiday home and a dog? Thing is, every time I thought of something cool - like living on a tropical island, teaching yoga and looking after stray kittens and puppies - this voice would come into my head saying "But you have to be realistic! Otherwise, you are being silly!"
It didn't seem to matter to me that the aim exercise wasn't to think about what I could realistically achieve. I was meant to be thinking big, thinking outside what might seem possible. I was allowed to be silly!
I found this to be really confronting. Like if I said something crazy, I would be ridiculed if I then failed to achieve it. Which is daft, really. Because when others shared their awesome hopes and dreams, my instinct was not to ridicule them. It was to encourage them. Their dreams sounded great. And I wanted to think of ways that they could actually achieve maybe even just one small part of their dream to help them on their way.
But I was still unable to think of anything for myself. I am just not sure what my real dream is. There is definitely a lot of work for me to do around this.
Hmmm...
So day two and I am already feeling challenged. Imagine where I will be by the end of the year!!
1 comment:
Love this! I am one of those people that can vision my ideal life and have non stop creative ideas so that it is kind of overwhelming, but I am in a group right now called She Creates Change (about creating the life you want) and there are women that can't see that vision yet, and it's okay. They are working on themselves and playing with their passions to realize their dream life. I'm sure this yoga teacher training will shift a lot of things for you!
Namaste,
Liv
livzlove.com
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