Resolutions that don't suck

Merry Christmas you guys! 

Now that Christmas is coming to a close for another year, it is time to put down that mince pie and start thinking about the new year that you are about to embark on.

Because no matter how crappy last year was for you, 2014 has something that 2013 hasn't got:

Potential!

Which is why, at the end of each year, we all feel compelled to come up with a list of things that we are currently failing miserably at with the hope that this will somehow make us more focussed on doing things differently in the new year.

Unfortunately though, notwithstanding best intentions, most people manage maybe a couple of weeks of sticking to their resolutions before going back to their old ways. At least until next year, when they start to think about it all over again.

I have a pretty woeful record myself. Giving up caffeine, going vegan (I ended up doing this but not off the back of a new year's resolution), exercising more, focussing on my career, reading more - all of them managed to keep me interested until about January 5 before the drudgery of day to day life made keeping my new resolutions seem unimportant and, to be honest, a bit of a pain in the arse.

But a few years ago, I decided to take a different approach. I had a pretty massive list of things to change or improve on in the new year. I wanted to do more yoga, eat better, be more organised, try new things, spend more time with friends and family, give more to charity (but do proper research first so my money went where it would help the most), draw, write, dance, sing and read more, see more bands, see more theatre blah blah blah. It was ridiculous. Way too much stuff to focus on for 5 days.

But each one was actually really important to me so I didn't want to just give up on them all together either.

So, rather than set myself up to fail (again) I decided that I would spread them out over the whole year instead. I picked one thing that I wanted to work on for each month of the year. This way, I wouldn't have to feel guilty about something that was on the list just because I hadn't done it in January - I knew I would be getting to it later on in the year (maybe)!

For example, February was all about work - getting more organised, finding out what training sessions were on, looking into getting an executive coach etc. I didn't have to get it all done by a particular date or anything - I just had to think about what I wanted to improve about my work life in February and set a few things in motion. September was devoted to yoga - so I decided I would try to do yoga at least once a day for the whole month (I think I missed three days), tried out different classes and signed up for online classes on YogaGlo so I could do more yoga at home.

So now, each year at the end of December, I make up a big calendar with all the different resolutions set out on it at the start of the year and I stick it up in my office. All year long I look at it to see what was coming up or maybe what I had accidentally skipped (oops!). Sometimes I might even get really excited about it - like the month that was all about culture where I got to book tickets to see lots of different plays, bands, talks etc that were coming up. The month about getting my finances in order, on the other hand, wasn't such a joy.

It isn't always a total success - some resolutions get pretty much ignored - but it was definitely better than the attempts I had made in previous years where I set one of two huge resolutions that take effect from 1 January. And because I get to keep doing things all year long, it is far more achievable and balanced than the usual approach.

So, of course, this year, I am doing it again! Here is what I have got so far:

This year is all about integrating my yoga teaching with the rest of my life. So the whole of January is dedicated to setting this up (as much as possible). I usually do health stuff in January because I feel so crappy after indulging so much of the holidays, but I need to get my business in order first. 

Would love to hear if anyone else has big new year resolutions planned - or if anyone takes up my year of resolutions idea. Drop me a line in the comments. 

Oh and have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!! 

xx 

A very yogi christmas!

It is a poorly kept secret of mine that I absolutely LOVE christmas. To give you an idea of how much I love it, I have been listening to christmas songs since November - as I do every year (this was a rule imposed by my dad - because otherwise we would start listening to them in, like, July).

So you might be thinking (hopefully) what would a yogi like me (and especially me) want to receive under his or her christmas tree? Well, you are in luck!!! Because this post is totally dedicated to helping you pick the perfect gift for the yogi in your life!

And if you think that this is a carefully constructed ruse to give a massive hint to people re what *I* would like for christmas? Yeah - you are probably right. But hopefully it helps some others out too. I live to serve after all.

1. Yogeeks Apparel - all the things!

I have only recently found out about Yogeeks Apparel - one of the owners of this awesome yoga and vegan friendly clothing line is involved in a new project that I am part of, Yoga in the Park. They are a Sydney-based business that makes wicked-cool clothes for yogis. Just reading their mission statement makes me swoon:

"We’re all about making compassion fashionable. We test our yoga clothing on yogis, not animals & are dedicated practitioners of ahimsa (non-harming) in our own lives & throughout every stage of our design & production process."

Awesome, right? There are so many things that I want on their website. But to get the most bang for your buck, how about spoiling your yogi with a multi-pack? My choice is the muscle tee multi pack (4 muscle tees in the latest, coolest prints) but there are tank and singlet multipacks too. What better way to start off what will no doubt be a long term affair with this ethical, kickass design house? 

2. Namaste, b*tches!  

Not for every yogi, but I think this tote (available through Cafe Press) is rad. 

3. The ultimate mat

I have more than one mat already. So technically, I don't need another one. BUT if you really, really wanted to buy me (sorry - your "friend") a new mat, please let it be this one. And in Acai purple, please. Thaaaaaanks!

This is a Manduka Eko - it is like the legendary Manduka PRO and is uber durable and grippy but made from sustainable, eco-friendly  natural rubber. Plus, purple! 

4. Flop your flips to class

What better way to get to class than in a pair of flip flops that are made from yoga mats? Yep - Sanuk Yoga Mat flip flops are made from yoga mats, are vegan and are THE most comfortable flip flops I have ever worn (and as an Australian who lived most of her life on the coast, I am somewhat of a flip flop aka thongs connoisseur). I bought a pair in Hawaii but if you would really like to buy me (I mean your friend!!) a pair, this pair in brown look FAB!

5. Your in-house yogalebrity

I know - in an ideal world, you would like to be able to give your friend me for christmas (meaning private yoga classes with me, of course!) But the next best thing is surely to do yoga in the lounge room with yogi extraordinaire, Tara Stiles. Easy-peasy. And relatively cheap too!

I was lucky enough to do a class with Tara when I was in New York earlier this year and visited her beautiful studio, Strala Yoga. Her feel-good flowing classes are all centred around the idea of moving with ease - something I have focussed on in my own practice and teaching since. Her DVDs are an excellent way to bring some of this sweetness into a home practice and are ideal for someone who is just getting started. So if you are buying for a yogi newbie, this set of 4 DVDs is the ticket!

6. Super hot pants

Sexy pants make yoga more fun. Sexy pants made from recycled water bottles make yoga fun and lets you feel super-smug because not only are you a sexy yogi, you are also environmentally friendly. Doesn't your yogi loved-one deserve to feel sexy, fun and smug? Yeah? Then grab them a pair of these Teeki pants!

I have a couple of pairs and I LOVE them. They feel amazing, fit great, are a flattering cut, super comfortable and always elicit lovely compliments from my fellow yogis. I have the Clouds Hot Pant and Mermaid Goddess Capris, but this cheetah print (called Awakening) is the next on my wish-list. I am sure yogi in your life would love them too!

7. Ahimsa* assistance

Shopping for a vegan or vegan-curious yoga buddy? Give them a helping hand by buying them a gorgeous vegan cook book! There are heaps out there, but I am going to suggest this new one, Veganissimo, by Sydney-based vegan cook, Leigh Drew. I picked it because I have been lucky enough to have eaten Leigh's yummo vegan cooking before and can attest that it is AMAZING!

*Not sure what Ahimsa is or what is so yogi about it? Well, ahimsa is one of the five yamas or restrictions that form the first of the eight limbs of yoga. It essentially translates to "non-violence" and while it encompasses many practices such as abstaining from violence in all forms (i.e. violent actions, words and even thoughts), it is often interpreted as not only meaning you should not harm other humans, but also not harming all other animals too. Which is why many yogis are also vegetarian or vegan.

8. The "Ohmygoddess I love you more than my Lululemon Wunder Under pants" gift 

This is the absolute ultimate yogi gift. Like, you will get so many karma credits for this puppy that you could probably get away with killing someone and still be in the black. Well not really because ahimsa, you guys! But you get my point. This is pretty massive.

The yoga retreat!!!

There are many of these, but I would LOVE to go to this one in Ubud, Bali next year which is being put on by my fave yoga studio, House of Yoga. A week long retreat of yoga goodness at Michael Franti's Soulshine Oasis Retreat Centre.

Drool. I can't imagine anything more magical!


But remember, while all these gifts are shiny and pretty (and feel free to buy me ANY of them!) christmas is a perfect time to celebrate all of the gifts that you already have - because you already have everything you need to be happy residing within you. So surround yourself with love, be grateful for everything this beautiful life bestows on us, and smile a lot. It will give you so much more than even a week in paradise can! (Although, there is nothing to say that you can't practice gratitude and smile lots while at a retreat wearing sexy pants and practicing asana on your lovely new mat... arm, right?"

xox Namaste! ;)

Doing what you know you should

I am almost at the end of a 10 day detox. Day 9 in fact. No dairy, no alcohol (neither of which I have anyway), no sugar (eep!) and no caffeine (eeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!!). Plus yoga classes every day (not a big change, but it did mean that I had to go to 6.30am classes to make sure that I didn't miss a day - so, no more sleep-ins and more EEEEEEEEEP!!!!)

So why do this?

Well, at teacher training the other week we were asked to make a couple of lists: one of things that support our wellbeing (stuff like yoga, meditation, eating well, getting plenty of sleep, reading, laughing, practising gratitude, spending time with positive people) and the other of things that don't support our wellbeing (drinking coffee, sleeping in, eating junk, gossiping, procrastinating, negative self-talk, spending time with toxic people).

Seeing all these things written down really got me thinking - given that was so easy for me to come up with these lists, why don't I do more of the things on the first list, and waaaaay less of the things on the second list?

The answer is the same for me as it is for all of us - comfort. Even though I know that sticking with my current habits doesn't make me feel as great as I could feel, I get comfort from them. Like when I am feeling down on myself, so to make myself feel better I decide to treat myself - I skip yoga, eat pizza and chocolate and read trashy gossip magazines until late. Then I sleep in the next morning (again skipping yoga and meditation), drink coffee to stay awake all day and feel even worse about myself. Which is all my fault, because I am stupid and awful and deserve to feel this crappy. Sound familiar? Well it sounds really familiar to me because I do it way too much!

When my yoga studio (the totally wonderful House of Yoga in Redfern) announced that it was launching a 10 Day Push, I decided it would be the kick up the butt I needed to change things up a bit. And change them for the better!

And as I come to the end of the 10 days, I have to admit - I feel amazing! I have been getting up really early, feeling awake all day, eating well, sleeping well, my mood is more stable, I am more focussed, happier, grateful... I seem to be attracting more positive, supportive people into my life too.  All in just 9 days!?!?!

It's true - day one was tough. I had headaches and was in a major brain-fog all day. And yes, it sucks when I walk to work and the whole of the city seems to be enjoying delicious smelling coffee. Or when I walk past the cup cake stall on my way to buy lunch. But it has not been impossible. And every day that I stick to the plan, I am supporting my wellbeing and choosing to happiness. Even on rough days, I am in the best possible place to deal with the challenges I am thrown.

Ok - so maybe I am still in the euphoric, honeymoon stage. There is only one way to find out for sure - to keep it all up even after the 10 days are over!!

Wish me luck!
xoxo

Hear no evil, say no evil

My 30 day challenge for September went really well - I managed to fit my yoga and meditation in on 28 of the 30 days - and for many of the days I did it longer than I had committed to.

Even better - I have kept it up so far even though it is now October. 

But that doesn't mean that I haven't set a new challenge for the new month! While I admit that October did kind of creep up on me and I didn't have a challenge until the 2nd (which I figure is ok cos there are 31 days in October!), I have managed to come up with a doozy! 

Inspiration actually hit me at the hairdressers (it takes over two hours for me to keep my roots in check so I had a lot of time to think). One of my guilty pleasures at the hairdressers is to read those really trashy magazines. I used to buy them myself but found they were so full of negativity and hatefulness that I just didn't need in my life so I stopped. But at the hairdresser, I let myself flip through them and look at all the pretty people (and try to ignore all the stuff about who has put on too much weight, who has lost too much weight, who looks ugly without makeup, who is losing their boyfriend/ husband/ dignity). This week, pretty much every single magazine had Miley Cyrus on the front. 

There is a lot going on with the whole Miley thing, and I am not going to go into it here. I didn't read the articles but there were a bunch of photos of her (stills from her latest video and her VMA performance), her now ex-fiance Liam and his new girlfriend (I think) so I am guessing it was something to do with the breakdown of her relationship. I looked at the photos for a bit before flicking on to the next pages where all the red carpet fashion shots were (my favourite part of the trash mags). The woman next to me though, who was reading the same mags, clearly found the story about Miley far more upsetting (although I doubt she read the article either - I mean, does anyone?). 

"Oh gawd! Just *look* at her, would you!" she exclaimed, "No wonder Liam left her! Would you want your girlfriend dressing like that? She looks like a total skank!" 

This kind of a reaction is not unusual. I have probably thought - maybe even said - things like this about celebrities before myself. But hearing it like that, it just suddenly struck me how awful and useless this kind of gossip was. Seeing a photo or two, making a snap decision and assumptions about someone you don't really know and casting dispersions about who they are (and it is seldom something nice like, "Oh, I bet she is really nice to her granny!"  or "She has great teeth - she must floss a lot!") - all it serves is to put negativity out into the world. And to what end? To show your concern? Doubtful. To feel superior to the person you are gossiping about and make you feel better about yourself? Far more likely. 

Whether you are saying it about a celebrity or someone you know, when you engage in nasty gossip, not only are you being unnecessarily mean, it actually exposes parts of yourself that you are probably trying to hide. Why do you feel the need to point out how much weight someone has put on? Why do you like to tell people about someone's relationship failures? Why are you so interested in this piece of gossip that you feel the need to vocalise it and spread it to others? Maybe you don't want to think about those things. Because it is a LOT easier to just point and judge others than to look inside to see what might be really upsetting you.

Ok - that sounds really preachy, doesn't it? So let's get something straight. I gossip. I don't even know how much but probably a lot. I get caught up in it at work, with friends, with family, at yoga - everywhere that people meet up and chat, there is gossip and I am just as susceptible to it as anyone else. And, given I used to pride myself on being a totally caustic bitch, I can be pretty cutting if I really get caught up in it. It is not pretty at all. 

But, for the month of October, I am not going to gossip. 

Given that I am often not actually aware that I am gossiping until it is too late, this is going to be one tough-arse challenge! I am not even sure exactly where the line is just between observation or a meaningful discussion and actual, proper gossip. I just kind of feel like it is something I get involved in too often and it is something where, when I witness it or catch myself in the middle of it, I really don't like what I hear. 

Source: www.radicalimprov.net

I don't expect I will be able to meet this challenge 100 per cent. I think I will probably slip into the habit quite a bit in fact. But when I do, I am going to try to catch myself, stop, and then think about what it is that has made me say the things I am saying. What does this gossip say about me, my fears and my challenges? Does the person I am gossiping about represent something I dislike in myself? Someone I wish I could be more like but that I am too scared to be? 

I am hoping that, by being more aware of the things I say over the next month, this will lead to me gossiping less and generally being a nicer person. Which sounds good, right? And again, will let you know on FaceBook how I am progressing. 

Wish me luck!!! 

Losing my identity

So I am slowly starting to lose my identity. And honestly, this is a good thing.

Say whaaat? Let me explain.

For many years, I was "the angry girl". I am pretty sure it started off just as a defence mechanism, carefully constructed so I could survive high school. And it was successful in achieving this. Basically, I would respond to my detractors - some bullies (including some teachers) but also I am guessing a few kids who may have been genuinely nice but who I hastily assessed as being hostile - with bitchy, acerbic comebacks. And to avoid them bothering me at all, I took on a generally a moody/ angry disposition. I had some friends, but even they were kept at a bit of a distance and treated them with suspicion - because I never fully believed that they actually liked me. I figured I must have served some secondary purpose for their own high school survival. And that was fine by me.

High school can be a tough time. And just getting out the other end in one piece is a sign of success. But, unfortunately, I started to forget that I had created this identity (angry, sarcastic, depressed, dark etc etc) and it became a big part of who I thought I was.

Me as a teen - getting my angst on!

When bad things happened in my life, it reinforced my negative outlook and my general distrust of people. When good - even great! - things happened to me, whether in my relationships, study, work or whatever, I always assumed they were flukes and they were temporary.  I actually believed if too many good things were happening, then something really bad was coming just around the corner. So I could never enjoy the good. It just made me feel even more uneasy and anxious about my life.

As weird as it might seem, I wanted to stay feeling this way. I wanted to feel sad, depressed, angry or dissatisfied. This was what felt comfortable and familiar. Even though it wasn't serving me, I always found ways to bring me back to the same place.

While this might have been familiar and comfortable for me, as I am sure you can imagine, it was not a happy way to live a life! But I told myself, and everyone else that is just who I am. And so I continued.

Until I finally I had enough. I didn't want to be miserable anymore. Or anxious. Or bitchy. I wanted to be happy, damn it!!!

To begin with, I searched for happiness in the usual ways - looking for quick-fixes through self-help books, food, excessive exercising, buying shiny things, searching for "success" at work. But the problem with quick-fixes is that their effects are quick too - they never created a permanent state of happiness and always lead me to searching for something more. And always searching outside of myself.

I was lucky enough to find my way to yoga while sifting through all of these happiness solutions. I originally looked to it as a form of exercise that was kinder to my body than the abuse I had been putting it through at the gym. It also happened to make me feel better too. Pretty soon it was the only kind of exercising I was doing. Taking all these yoga classes, I saw all these beautiful, blissed-out yogis teaching all my classes and I wanted some of what they had. I wanted to be a blissful, glowy yogi too!  So I decided to go further with my yoga practice - to start understanding and applying the more spiritual aspects rather than just the physical.

Me on yoga - all the happy!

And this is when real change started to happen. When I started setting aside some of my attachments to who I thought I was -  the stories I told myself and the world to explain why my life was so hard - I was nervous that I would lose who I *really* was. Which I thought was the sad girl that I had become so comfortable being. But instead of losing an essential part of myself (which is what I had convinced myself all this misery and anger was), I started to look at where this identity had come from. And I began to realise that none of it was my true nature - these parts of my personality were all external to who I really am. Through yoga - especially meditation - I was able start seeing things as they actually are, not how I had just always assumed they are.

This is the real magic, and arguably the purpose, of yoga: self-realisation through looking inward - not to those things that are external to us - and, ultimately, attaining an infinite state of peace.

Obviously, I have a long way to go on this path. I am only just beginning to move away from identifying myself with my limitations and from trying to find happiness through external means. But I am already noticing positive shifts. I am calmer. I am able to deal with change without as much anxiety. I don't obsess over the negatives and dismiss the positives.

Things are looking up, and my journey has only just begun!!

Namaste xox

Up for the challenge?

Have you seen this great TED Talk by Matt Cuts where he asks us to try something new for 30 days?

The idea of committing to something for a month - whether it be growing a moustache or not drinking - is not exactly new. But watching this talk really inspired me.

I always have these grand - and some not so grand - plans in my head: things I have always wanted to do, habits I have wanted to break, routines that I have wanted to start. There are always so many of them, though, that I often feel too overwhelmed and end up doing none of them. Or if I do start them, I do it in a half-arsed way.

That is why this talk makes so much sense. You just pick one thing and then you commit yourself to it for the next 30 days. And then the next month, you can choose something different.

The great thing about 30 days is it is short enough not to intimidate, but it is long enough to start making a real change in your life. (Or, if it doesn't work out, you haven't really wasted that much time either.)

So how transformative can one month be?

Well, it was because of a 30 day challenge that I set myself 2 years ago that I was able to make the shift from vegetarian to vegan. I had made a couple of previous attempts at going vegan. Each time I started, I assumed it was the beginning of a life-long change. And I would go ok for a week or so, but then something would come up - I would be at an event where I had forgotten to tell people I my dietary requirements, or I was eating out with friends and there weren't any vegan options on the menu (I now know better than to just rely on menus and always ask restaurants what they can do for me or I ask them to change an existing vegetarian meal by ditching the cheese). Whatever it was, it suddenly all seemed to hard, I would start making exceptions (only when I eat out) or excuses (it is just too hard) and then I would be back to where I began.

But, when I decided in 2011 that I would eat only plant-based for the whole of July, there was no need for excuses or exceptions. Because giving up eggs and dairy for 30 days (or 31 in my case) didn't seem like that big of a deal. And because I wasn't stressed about it, I was able to enjoy the experience. I ordered my first ever vegan pizza, found vegan cupcakes and tried vegan chocolate and I also started asking cafes and restaurants to make things vegan for me. And by August, it was done. I was a vegan!

Once you realise that vegan chocolate exists - and is delicious, it isn't so hard.

With today being the first day of spring, I felt inspired to set myself a new challenge. I have decided to make September all about yoga (surprise!). Given that I will be a qualified yoga teacher by the end of October (fingers crossed), I want to put a nice, regular yoga practice into place so that I will have a strong platform to build on when I start teaching.

So, for each day in September I will be doing at least 45 minute asana practice and 10 minutes of meditation. My intention is to wake up earlier to get my practice done before the day even starts. But even if I don't manage that, I will be doing it before I go to bed. Every. Day. For 30 days.

Sadly, I won't be yoga-ing with these views every morning :(

Wish me luck! I will be giving updates on my Facebook page if you want to follow along. And feel free to join in - I would love to hear from others about their successes and experiences!

Namaste xox

A little bit of happy

Wouldn't it be nice if every time we felt a bit down, we could just take the day off work and head to the beach? Or better yet, make it a week and head overseas to some island where you can let go of your bad mood and bliss out in the sun?

Sadly, that isn't an option for 99.99% of us. When we wake up in a bit of a fog or just feeling low, we have drag ourselves up and out to our daily lives - work, kids  - whatever our commitments, they tend not to be things that can just wait until we are in a better mood.

So, what can we do?

Well, over time, I have come up with a bunch of small things that I can do that cost next to nothing (and in some cases are totally free!) and that can just make things seem a little brighter. Some might seem obvious, others ridiculous, but I thought I would share them anyway, just in case there is something in there that might help you out the next time you are feeling a bit crappy.

• Duh - I do some yoga! Whether it be going to a full class, doing some invigorating poses before I get dressed in the morning (and yes, occasionally in my office if the mood takes me) or taking time to do some breathing exercises and/or meditation. Yoga brings our focus back inside, away from external stressors and even away from our own thoughts. So it is particularly great to do if your mood is connected to an event, a person or your environment or if it is driven by negative thoughts that are running on repeat through your mind. By tuning back into your self through yoga, you can create some space between you and the cause of your mood - almost like a circuit-breaker - so you can start to see things more clearly and start moving forward. 

• I wear bright coloured socks. Ok - so this one probably seems a bit daft. But bright, cute socks totally make me happy! It is only a recent discovery, too. For ages, I would just buy (or steal my husband's) plain, mostly black socks because I figured this made it easier to always find a pair. But so boring!!! And then for some reason, I think it was during a big sale, I decided I would buy a pack of 3 Happy Socks socks which were multicoloured and a mix of spots and stripes. Since then, I have never gone back to black socks. It isn't like you can see them when I wear them because they are normally hidden by my boots or jeans. But I know that under all of that, there is a pair of brightly coloured, spotty socks. And that just makes me ridiculously happy. I own so many different pairs now - tie-dyed, hot pink animal print, little hamster faces - the cuter and brighter the better!

Source: www.pagesdigital.com

•  I take a nice, long hot bath. Sometimes, even just promising myself that I will have a nice, long hot bath when I get home can get me through a crappy day. Of course, it only works if I then follow-through with my promise! And I make the most of it - candles, bath salts, play my favourite music, put on a face mask (the steam from the bath can actually help the mask sink in and be even more effective) and plenty of time to just lie there and do nothing but soak in the goodness. It is something that I like to do on a Sunday evening - I tend to have the time then to really make the most of it and it makes me feel ready for the week. I especially recommend this if you get the "Sunday evening dread" - that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach when you realise that the weekend is almost over and that you have to face a perhaps unpleasant job for the next 5 days. (Also, maybe consider changing jobs - because Sunday evening dreads are, in my experience, a sign that something is not right at work.)

Source: www.topdog4me.com

• I listen to some old tunes and dance like I'm a teenager. When I am feeling good, doing something that makes me super happy, I don't *feel* like I am in my 30s. It is only when I am stressed out or feeling bummed that I feel my age - or sometimes even older. So I tap into those carefree younger days by putting on something old school, sing along really loud and dance, dance, dance! (Or, if I am listening to grunge, I kind of mosh about the house and maybe even air guitar a bit.) But, while this is heaps of fun and a great stress-reliever, if you are going to do this, it is VERY important to make sure you are on your own and no-one is likely to walk in on you. Because it could be hard to explain.

Source: www.sirensofsong.com

• I hang out with my cats. Sometimes I just need a bit of time out away from other people so I can recharge. But I never feel the need to spend less time with my cats. Because cats are great. They just want food, sleep and cuddles. And so long as you don't forget the food, they will give you all the love you could ever ask for. Just sitting on the couch, surrounded by my furry little guys makes me ridiculously happy. (I am pretty sure it will work with dogs too - dogs will lavish you with undivided attention and unconditional love, like you are the most wonderful person in the world. Pretty hard to stay unhappy with that kind of energy around you!)
  

So those are a few of the things that make me ridiculously happy. And I try to do them as often as possible - but especially when I'm feeling a little less than awesome. 

Would love to hear your own happy tricks - what do you to bring the smiles on? 

Is all pleasure just relief?

I have recently come back from a holiday. Which means, right now, I am feeling pretty relaxed and rejuvenated.

And while I was unwinding next to the pool, I came across a quote in the book I was reading that got me thinking about the nature of relaxation, pleasure and our perpetual pursuit of happiness. Strangely enough, it was 'Junky' by William S Burroughs:

"Perhaps all pleasure is relief."

He was talking about the pleasure and relief that junkies experience when they give in to their addiction after attempting to quit. While that is not an experience I am familiar with, I can definitely relate to the idea of having the main source of my pleasure or happiness being the release from a stressful or strenuous experience.  

Hell - often my holidays have felt like that. I will have been working so hard, doing longing hours and feeling like I am being pulled in all directions right up until the moment my plane leaves. And then - nothing. Days and days with no deadlines, no stress, no routine. I normally spend the first few days just catching up on sleep. And, if things have been particularly bad, I find that sometimes I will get sick thanks to adrenal fatigue and a poor, worn out immune system. 

But there is that feeling you get when something that seems unbearable - something that you are just white-knuckling your way through - finally stops. It is quite amazing, isn't it. And it can be pretty addictive. 

Back when I was an exercise junky, it wasn't just being ultra-fit or looking good that kept me going to the gym - it was that pleasure from relief that really kept me motivated. I used to get through a tough class or a long run by thinking about how good it would feel when I stopped. How great that hot shower would feel on my aching and exhausted muscles. How deeply I would sleep that night. And I would use this to push myself harder, knowing that it would make the reward all that sweeter. 

The trouble is though, as sweet as the reward might be, when you are seeking pleasure through relief, it is only ever temporary. And, of course, it comes at a cost - the pain and discomfort that comes from pushing yourself to the extreme, be it mentally, physically or emotionally. Hardly a sustainable path to happiness, is it?

But what if feeling happy was your normal state? Something that you just experienced every day. Is that even possible? 

Well, I am starting to come around to the idea that not only is this possible - it is possible for me! 

It isn't a quick-fix though, like you might get from drugs, drinking, a holiday, exercising, shopping or anything else we might use for a immediate dose of happy. You actually have to commit to being a happy person. And that requires a commitment to changing the things in your life that aren't serving you. The things that take you further away from feeling happy every day. You need to let go of old habits and introduce good ones. Which will required you to be disciplined and, occasionally, uncomfortable. 

Because, even though we might know on an intellectual level that the things we are currently doing are not making us happy in the long-term and may even make us feel worse - like eating too much, not exercising enough or exercising too much, working too hard, drinking to excess, gossiping about people, spending too much time on the internet - we find comfort in these things. These are things that we are familiar with and it can be scary to let go of them. 

Which explains why people go for the quick-fixes. They are a LOT easier! But, ultimately, they don't really work. And they won't deliver what you are really after - to be happy! 

So what could you be doing differently to start being happier? 

To make it less scary, try making a commitment to making just one change for the next 30 days, just to see what it feels like. If you want to, you can go back to your old ways afterwards.

But chances are, you won't want to. Instead, you might find that you have have replaced an old habit with a new one - one that serves you and brings you closer to the life that you want. And sure enough, you will be ready to make even more changes! 

Here's to a happy life - not just relief!

Keeping your face kind

I am going on holiday to the US and Canada in a couple of weeks. Cannot wait!

I plan on hitting all the shops, museums, art galleries and cafes that I can fit in while in New York City and also Toronto. Then, to end the trip, I am going to be in Hawaii, soaking up rays, playing in the surf and eating all the tropical food I can. And, of course, I will be trying out a few different yoga studios along the way.

Bliss!

One of the things that I will definitely be stocking up on while I am in the US will be cosmetics. Due to the high Australian dollar and also some really weird regulations in Australia, cosmetics can cost almost three times as much in Australia than they do in America. You can order some products online direct from America and save $$ that way, but a lot of them won't deliver here. So whenever I go to the States, I go on a buying frenzy and come back with at least a year's worth of cosmetics. 

Given that I am a vegan, it makes sense that I would also like the products I buy to be cruelty free. So I have done a bit of research first to make sure that I am only buying products that are worthy of my dollars. But finding information about who does and does not test on animals (either directly or indirectly) can be incredibly confusing and it changes all the time. While I thought I had been doing ok on this front, I recently became aware of a few brands that I had always thought were ok have now been added to the list of companies that DO test on animals or are affiliated with animal testing. 

Sad. Face. 

Why do so many companies continue to test on animals when there are proven, cruelty-free alternatives readily available? Well, it seems that one of the key reasons is so that the companies can sell their products in China - Chinese laws require animal testing to be undertaken on cosmetics that are being imported into China. 

So companies that had for a long time abolished animal testing - including Estee Lauder, Mary Kay and Avon - have now resumed animal testing of their products to gain access to the lucrative Chinese market. There are other big companies that are also involved in animal testing, including L'Oreal and Johnson & Johnson. These companies own a huge number of popular brands - which means that all of the brands that they own are also not 100% cruelty free. 

Some popular brands that are NOT cruelty free (according to the PETA website) include: 

• Aveeno (Johnson & Johnson)
• Bobbi Brown (Estee Lauder)
• Bumble & Bumble (Estee Lauder) 
• Clinique (Estee Lauder)
• Garnier (L'Oreal)
• Jo Malone (Estee Lauder)
• Kiehl's (L'Oreal)
• L'Occitane
• Lancome (L'Oreal)
• M.A.C Cosmetics (L'Oreal)
• Neutrogena (Johnson & Johnson)
• Revlon
• Shu Uemura (L'Oreal)
• SK-II (Procter & Gamble)

To all of these brands, I say BOOOOO!!!!! There are many other mean brands too - this is just a sample of some of the ones that I have previously purchased but will no longer be buying. It is worth checking the PETA website to see if your favourite brands are listed too. (And information and practices change all the time - so companies come off and on the list all the time. You should check the list regularly to make sure your brand is still behaving itself!) 

Ok. So that is depressing, right? But fear not! There are still some lovely, amazing, quality brands out there that do not test on animals!!! HOORAY!!!!!

Source: www.themescompany.com

To act on my beliefs via my credit card, I am only going to buying cosmetics from companies that are proudly cruelty free. I have made a list of some of the brands that I can happily buy so that I don't get confused by all the pretty colours when I walk into Sephora (if you aren't familiar with Sephora, it is this amazing super-store that sells pretty much every brand of cosmetics you could ever want - I can spend hours and many, many dollars in there). 

Here are some of my favourites:

• Urban Decay (this edgy, vegan, cruelty free brand is going to replace my M.A.C addiction).
• Stila (gorgeous colours, gorgeous textures, kind to all animals)
• Lush (natural, animal friendly and it all smells delicious - just try not to eat it)
• Kora (Miranda Kerr's organic skin care range that really works)
• Ultraceauticals (active ingredients for serious skin care, and cruelty free)
• Aesop (makes your hair and skin look great and smell amazing thanks to high-quality natural ingredients)
• Philosophy (another great skin care range that can deliver amazing results without needing to test on animals - and their shower gels are to DIE for!)
• Illamasqua (this brand makes amazing, innovative make-up, like the kick-ass blue lipgloss that I bought recently, without touching animals)
• Kevin.Murphy (given I won't be buying any more Bumble & Bumble hair products, this is going to be my new go-to, animal friendly hair care range)
• Manic Panic (the leaders in extreme, unicorn hair colours - pink, blue, green, orange, purple - it is all good)
• Butter London (nail polish in amazing colours, free from formaldehyde, toluene and DBP and is kind to the animals)

Source: www.freegreatpicture.com

Again, this is not an exhaustive list. If you want to know if a particular brand is cruelty free, first check out the PETA website. If it isn't listed on the list of companies that DO test and it isn't listed on the DO NOT test list, the next step is to check out the company's website. And if you are still unsure, email the company and ask them whether they test on animals. 

(It is also worth asking them if they supply to China because if they do, they basically HAVE to be testing on animals - even if the product supplied to you in Australia or elsewhere hasn't been tested. A dead give-away is if their statement is something like "We do not test our products on animals or use ingredients that have been tested on animals unless required to by law" - this is code for "We test on animals so that we can supply to China". BOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!)

They don't make it easy to make sure you are looking cute without hurting any animals - but it is totally worth it. 

Source: www.reallycuteanimals.co.uk

And the bunnies thank you!!!!! (And I do too!)

(PS - I made a decision not to add any pictures of the bunnies and other animals that have actually been subjected to testing. If you haven't already seen the horrific photos, I am sure you know, in your heart of hearts, that this testing is incredibly detrimental to the rabbits and that they suffer greatly just so we can wear a particular brand of mascara or use a certain shampoo. But if you happen to be curious, or if you are thinking that maybe it isn't that bad and companies wouldn't be doing anything too awful to these gorgeous, innocent creatures, have a look for yourself here. It will break your heart.)